courtesy of Indexed (thisisindexed.com)

Now, I have a feeling if this were the bracket for YA trends, vampires would beat out zombies and take the championship, and fairies would have made it a little bit farther. But I won't lie that I kind of wish the zombie apocalypse beats out the vampire trend eventually...

Would these be your picks?

~Elana

courtesy of INDEXED (thisisindexed.com)

I think you can read this one of two ways:

1. The better the writing, the better the read.
2. The more you read, the better you write.

One of my English professors in college always said that if you wanted to ever be a writer you had to READ EVERYTHING. Read constantly. Fill your head with words, because the more you read, the more you know how to use them. The more ingrained the ebb and flow and structure and grammar of the English language seeps into your brain.

Even just the repeated viewing of printed words on the page teaches you what your written words should look like. And I think a few glimpses into the query pile would show you some examples where it's clear people aren't quite familiar with the basic LOOK of prose, let alone it's finer nuances.

So what do you think? And what are you reading these days?

Before I get to the winners, I want to mention that there were a few funny trends in the lies, which lead me to believe you are all constantly thinking about the follow:

1. Chuck Norris
2. JK Rowling
3. Food

Seriously!

Also, after reading the fibs, Darren and I realized we couldn't stick strictly to our first, second and third place prizes. So we changed it up just a bit. There was actually a tie for the grand-prize, and we also liked a whole lot of them for third place, so we decided to a group of honorable mentions that all get BAH stickers. More winners!

And now, without further ado...

The GRAND PRIZE winners of a signed book and a partial manuscript critique are:

• @DelilahSDawson for: "I don't make snow angels. I make snow narwhals."
• @mistyprovencher for: "I did not eat the crayons. I just smile rainbows."

SECOND PLACE of a limited edition BAH poster and a query letter critique goes to:

• @LiteraryMouse for: "Just below the Earth's crust is a thin layer of chocolate pudding. Geologists don't talk about it because they want to eat it themselves."

And a whole batch of HONORABLE MENTIONS who are getting BAH stickers:

• @Donna_Earnhardt for: "I carved the faces on Mount Rushmore...with my toothbrush."
• @KeimComley for: "My homework ate my dog."
• @KCBooks for: "I did not eat brownies for breakfast."
• @YolaRamunno for: "I don't know what I really look like because every mirror I look into shows me someone different."
• @JaneLebak for: "Actually, Wednesday will be held on Thursday this Friday."

If you are one of the winners, please email me at: elana [at] johnsonliterary [dot] com. 

Congrats to everyone! And happy release day, DOUG-DENNIS AND THE FLYAWAY FIB!

The task: Tweet us your BEST FAT FIB. That's right, we want a "140 characters or less" little white lie, fat yellow fib, or what have you. 

Let's start with the prizes to entice you.

• The GRAND PRIZE WINNER of the FAT FIB contest will receive:
  • A signed copy of DOUG-DENNIS AND THE FLYAWAY FIB
  • A partial manuscript critique, from me, Elana. 
  • The pride (and shame!) of knowing you are one fantastic liar!
• Second prize: A signed + numbered letterpress BAH Poster (250 limited edition! You'd be very special!) plus a query critique from me. 
• Third Prize: A pack of BAH stickers. This is official membership to the Doug Street Team! (Check out Darren's blog for places the BAH sheep has been sighted.) 

So you think you're a fabulous liar? Then you better participate. Here are the rules.... (Note: after the pitchslam last month, I am going to be more of a stickler about this one. You MUST follow all of them. I just don't care to make exceptions this time around. And if I change the rules? Deal with it.)

1. Follow the brilliant Doug-Dennis/Darren Farrell on Twitter: @HonestDoug.  
2. Enter your fabulous, fat fibs on Twitter. (Fibs posted as comments to this blog post will be enjoyed, but not judged. For some ideas of how to fib, check out the Fib Factory.)
3. You MUST use this hashtag in your tweet: #fatfib (If you don't use it, we'll never see it!)
4. You may enter up to 5 (FIVE) fibs.
5. How do lies and fibs cross the globe, growing bigger all the way? By repeating them! Spread the word about the contest! 
6. Darren and I will be the sole judges of the contest.
7. The deadline for this contest is 9AM Eastern Time on Thursday, March 4th (release day!). Winners will be announced Friday morning. There are no exceptions to this! If any fat fib tweets are sent after that time, they will NOT be read.

Now get thee to Twitter and start fibbing!

~Elana

Query letters come in all shapes and sizes, most of them ill-fitting, clunky, or unhelpful. But every now and again you get a good one that has both the right shape and the right content. So I asked my client Eli Stutz, author of the forthcoming PICKLE IMPOSSIBLE, if I could use one of his letters. Now Eli actually queried me with another project first, which I read and considered, and while I was reading and considering, Eli finished a second book, which was the stronger project that we decided to move forward with. Even though we were already in touch, he wrote a second letter. And here it is:

Dear Ms. Roth,

A boy with a hidden power and the girl who was sent to stop him have 24 hours to win a pickle contest.

12-year-old Pierre La Bouche is a cornichon. That's French for 'pickle', but it also means 'good-for-nothing'. A middle child who gets straight C's, he's never been No. 1 at anything. When the family farm goes broke, grandfather Henri gives Pierre a mission: to save the farm by winning an international pickle contest.

En route to the contest, Pierre meets Aurore, the charming but less-than-truthful granddaughter of a rival farmer. She's been sent to ensnare Pierre, but after a wake up call from her conscience, she rescues him. Together, they navigate the ghostly Paris catacombs, figure out how to crash land a plane, and duel with a black-hearted villain who will stop at nothing to capture their pickles. In their most desperate hour, it is Pierre's incredible simplicity that saves the day. Always bickering but becoming friends, Pierre and Aurore discover that anything is possible, no matter how hard it may seem.

I KIDNAPPED THE PICKLE BOY is complete at 32,500 words. I'm a technical writer by day, optimistic novelist by night. Recently, I've interviewed a host of pickle makers and French natives. My own pickles are fermenting in the kitchen. I grew up in Toronto and live with my wife and children in Israel.

Thank you for your consideration. I hope to hear from you.

Kind Regards,

Eli Stutz

So let's review. At the core of this letter are 3 main paragraphs. Two of them are about the book. The last and shortest is about the author. Sure, he tosses in a little tagline, which is totally unnecessary, but it worked here, so I'll leave it alone. Let's go through each paragraph:

1. The first paragraph introduces our main character and the set-up. He uses concrete things to describe Pierre. He throws in the French flair of the book right away. And he doesn't beat around the bush to tell me what Pierre has to accomplish.
2. The second delves a little deeper into the plot. It gives me the complication that will drive the story forward--someone is out to stop Pierre. And then Eli accomplishes the most important trick here: he gives me some fun examples of what will happen in the book without summarizing the entire plot. That is key because I don't want to read the whole book in the query letter. But he gives me flavor.
3. His bio paragraph is straight to the point, not overcrowded with his whole life history, and also ties light-heartedly right back to the subject of the book. I loved that he tried fermenting his own pickles. (He later told me they weren't very good.)

Here's the kicker. The total word count on this letter is 242 words. 242! Look how much he fits into 242 words. There's plot, character, personality and quirk. From this tightly written letter I know I'm going to get a fun, zany story. Those of you who wanted 250 words just to pitch your book, take heed! Shorter is better.

(You'll notice the book also went through a title change before I sent it out to editors. I KIDNAPPED THE PICKLE BOY was a little lengthy, and without picking it up, you'd never know Aurore is actually the narrator. But Eli came up with the adorable PICKLE IMPOSSIBLE that hit the nail on the head.)

So I hope it's clear why this letter worked. It stood out in a pile with its charm and flavor. The subject of the book matches the language and style of the letter. And Eli showed me he understands the economy of language. His word choices are deliberate, which makes me confident his book will be as tightly written. 

Any questions? Leave 'em below.

So now that it's all over, I wanted to put together some thoughts and stats. Caren received 216 pitches. I received 164. I'm not doing stats for Caren's stuff, and mine are not scientific, nor to they really all add up, so just look at them as trends. Out of my 164...

• 2 - were requested as full manuscripts
• 4 - invited to query with full letter and writing sample
• 17 - were flat out categories I don't represent

Now, a loose breakdown by genre (I may have doubled up here and there):

• 66 - Fantasy/Sci-Fi (I grouped dystopian in here too) 
• 43 - Contemporary fiction
• 11 - Historical (3 of these were prehistoric!)
• 12 - Paranormal (ghosts or physics)
• 6 - Mystery of some kind
• 3 - Picture Book
• 14 - Adult books
• 15 - Couldn't tell

There were also 3 that came in after the deadline passed, where people created fresh threads because I had locked the forums. I did not read those. I thought about it, but then realized it just wasn't fair to everyone else who paid attention. I also saw a few pitches that I've definitely seen as queries before. (Yes, I do remember almost everything.) 

Here's what I learned:

1. Most people get it right (thank you!), but there are always people who can't follow instructions. Either they don't bother to read the instructions, or just can't understand the instructions. I know this is just part of the game, but it's still infinitely frustrating. I got categories I didn't ask for, and people who posted twice. Or have taken up bombarding our comments sections with "Did you pick me yet?" type notes.
2. The two biggest reasons I rejected things were the same as usual: A) it just wasn't the right fit for me personally and B) the premise was derivative in some way and just wouldn't differentiate itself at all.
3. Argue all you want, but 100 words was plenty of words, but most people need more practice in tightening and including the right information. 

I would like to elaborate on Point #3 the most. In feedback I've gotten from people here and on Twitter, I noticed that some people felt more words (like maybe 250) would have allowed for better request rates. That with more words people could fit the right information in. Caren and I asked so many "What is this about?" questions because we didn't give you enough real estate. To this I say: Bah!

This is a pitch of 100 words:

In Candor, Florida, every teen wants to be like Oscar Banks. The town-founder’s son, Oscar earns straight As, is student-body president, and is in demand for every club. But Oscar has a secret. He knows that parents bring their teens to Candor to make them perfect–-all through subliminal Messages that control them. Oscar's built a business sabotaging his father's scheme with Messages of his own, getting kids out before they're turned. Then he meets Nia, the girl he can't stand to see changed. Saving Nia means losing her forever. But keeping her in Candor, Oscar risks exposure...and more.

This one is only 87 words:

When best friends Doug-Dennis and Ben-Bobby go to the circus, something terrible happens. Doug- Dennis eats all of his friend’s popcorn, and then tells a fib (It wasn’t me!), which grows and grows (Maybe monsters ate it!), carrying Doug-Dennis away. As the lie gets bigger, Doug-Dennis flies higher, until he’s floating in a land of lies—some of them big, some small, and some just downright weird. Doug-Dennis misses his best friend, and realizes there’s only one way to come back down: by finally telling the truth.

Do you know what they do right? They use the right words. They get right to the point, don't get bogged down in subplots or too many details. And yet they have enough details to give me a framework. Plus they are well written. (And no, I actually didn't write either of them. These were the editors' versions. But I wrote equally good versions when I pitched it.)

Several people suggested that a full-page query would have been easier. But I often find that with longer formats, people find more ways to waste the space. Most people still don't know where their story is, or what information is important. And you know what? The paragraph in your query letter telling me about your book should only be this long anyway. (I can do another blog post on the preferred anatomy of a query letter if you're interested. But speak up in the comments.)

And one final thought: I do expect a direct correlation between quality of writing in pitches/queries and in the manuscripts. Even if the pitch doesn't include all the right data, it should still be well-written. In the cases where I said the writing wasn't strong enough, I had good reason not to want to see more. This is something you learn from experience.

So, in a nutshell, I still think shorter IS better, and the pitchfest showed me that people need much more practice with this. Get going. You have the examples. Go forth. 

I also would love to do some more contests and events like this in the future, but I'll definitely be tinkering the format and formula and trying some new things. So stay tuned!

I'm going to close my submissions from here until April 1st. That way I can comfortably get through the manuscripts I've requested (not to mention that have been in my inbox for a few months). For those pitching to me, you'll receive an automatic reply asking you to resend your query in April when I have more time to read.

Elana will still be reading queries and requesting material. Please visit our submission page to see what she's looking for. To query her, email her directly at elana@johnsonliterary.com. Check the spelling if you're not clicking on the link!

Thanks again and we're looking forward to reading the material we received.

Caren

I already noticed that several pitches came in after I locked the pitch threads at midnight EST last night. Since the time-cap was the 24 hours of Thursday EST, I can't promise we'll respond to those. You sneaky people who tried to skirt the system...

So stay tuned. We have a long day ahead of us, and we'll update you if we need more time. You can also check my Twitter feed today, since I might post some sporadic updates as we go. 

And next week I'll do a nice post-mortem blog post about this whole experiment.

~Elana

Thanks all who have already bravely posted their pitches in the forums! 

Just some housekeeping notes to keep me sane:

1. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE post your pitch INSIDE either the PITCH CAREN or PITCH ELANA threads. Do not create your own thread in the main forum window. I will delete these. Why? Because it's cluttered and then Caren and I can't tell who you are pitching. If you are a guilty party, please go post your pitch in the proper place. 

2. The pitchfest is not overriding or getting in the way of our normal query process. It's totally up to you.

3. We'll respond to them all tomorrow. You will likely get an email from one of us if we request your work. But check back in the forums as we comment on the pitches.

Thanks again!

Elana 

Thanks for all your great responses so far on this week's pitchfest we'll be hosting here at CJLA. As promised, here are the details and rules of how to participate.

1. Post your pitch on the CJLA FORUM (www.johnsonliterary.com/forum) on Thursday, January 28th. This means 12AM until the following 11:59PM. No exceptions. Any pitches posted outside of those time stamps won't be responded to. (We have to draw the line somewhere.)
2. Your pitch should be no more than 100 words long and tell us the overall concept/hook of your book. We do not want to hear the whole plot. This is good for us, and good for you. (For tidbits on how to pitch tightly, please see this previous blog post of mine.)
3. You may only pitch one project.
4. You may only pitch to one of us. (Since we overlap in YA, please take a closer look at the types of YA Caren and I each represent. She tends toward more paranormal and romance, I tend towards more speculative and high-concept.)
5. Your book needs to be finished, because we'll be requesting material from this session.

Other things:

• We don't care what country you're in.
• Pitching a project during this session in no way precludes you from querying us on another project in the future. So if we don't request your book this time around, the door is not closed for you to approach with another one via the usual submission process.
• If you're confused about what categories we're accepting, just look over our list again, and go with your gut. 

Caren and I will be responding live on Friday beginning at 10AM. We hope to get through them by noon (fingers crossed), but that will of course depend on how many pitches there. So please check back then.

Also, we will be giving some general feedback and advice, so be prepared for that. We hope this will help you in your pitching skills, so that even if we don't request your book, you'll be able to go out and find the right agent for you more confidently.

Any other questions? I'll answer a limited number of them in the comments to this post. 

Good luck!

~Elana